Car Test 2012

While I was on vacation this week and decided to rent a car for the week, test it out, and review it.  I wanted something different to drive, something I might not ordinarily drive . Something I might even enjoy.  I am not here to do a Top Gear style review sliding the car on a skid pad or drag racing.  This  is an honest car lovers  driving impression of what I drove like a typical person… on the highways and roadways.  This then is my 2011 Buick Lucerne car review.

I called a couple rental places and settled on one near me and opted for their “luxury car”.  The rep told me it could be a Cadillac (oh boy!!!!), Lincoln, or Buick.

I ended up with a silver 2011 Buick Lucerne.

In fact, it looked just like this one:

This was not my first choice, or even my second choice, but I decided to give it a go.  To call this a “luxury car” is a big stretch.  If this had been GM’s vision of modern luxury then it was no wonder they floundered and crashed.  I have driven BMWs, Cadillacs, Lexus, Lincolns, and Jaguars, and those are luxury cars.  I know Cadillac is GM, however that brand proves they know how to do it,  GM just failed miserably with this 2011 Buick Lucerne.

The outside looked sleek enough but the interior looked to be brought over from 2 generations earlier of this car… maybe 3 generations.  Not that it was,  just that the imagination and design implementation simply wasn’t there unless you are 80+ years old.  Harsh I know,  and to back up this statement I drove it 220 miles to my parents, whose average age is about 71 or so, to give me their impression and they absolutely loved the looks of it.  Neither of them drove it.  They just looked at it and sat in it.  Generational preferences I suppose.  It just proves this car is not a car for my generation.

This has been the very problem Buick has been having and it is a good thing they are trying to change the old driver image.

This 2011 version was supposed to be the start of that change. What the hell happened?  First, the seats absolutely suck.  Covered in leather sure but they provide all the support of a bass boat seat… covered in leather.  My ass and back would have been more comfortable on a see-saw seat.  The seats have so many adjustments and buttons I spent 15 minutes trying to find the nirvana of seating comfort.

Next the dash materials are some of the worst I have ever seen in any modern $30k vehicle.  The hard light gray plastic looks dirty and grey and the fake plastic wood grain in the dash, really?  This is befitting $12k car and even then it’s a slap in the face to those buyers. I think we need to petition against cheesy fake wood grain in any car!

Let’s have some words about the cup-holders.  There are two of them on the front seat console.  The cup holders are so close together that anything larger than two small drinks from McD’s cannot be placed side by side in the only two cup holders.  You can use cans,  or 20 oz bottles but no drink cups from any drive through.  They simply cannot sit nicely side by side.

What about the pedals?

The acceleration was weak with at least a 1 second delay from depressing the gas pedal to actually feeling momentum.  This was exacerbated by the weak gas pedal feel and spongy feeling brake pedal.  Once rolling on the highway acceleration was completely normal and adequate.  Perhaps this was to intentional to simulate the large barge cars of old.

Gas mileage was horrendous. It was about the same as what I got with my 1996 Pontiac Firebird Formula and I don’t take it easy in that car to get better mileage.  Honestly, this Buick sucked ass so badly that I returned it first thing Monday morning and checked out another vehicle.  Those impressions after I take it to Memphis and back.  Or you can go straight to it Car Test Part 2

What did I like? Well the auto dimming rear view mirror is slick.  The side marker lights come on brighter on the side you are turning toward to illuminate the side of the road better, nifty. The side mirrors tilt down when backing up so you can see the parking lines etc…  Which is good, except if you have been used to using the side mirrors to backup like a truck driver does…  I was a truck driver once and was trained to use them.

Do your back and ass a favor and don’t buy this generation 2011 Buick Lucerne.